Random Thoughts on Spider-Man: No Way Home from Jacob Schoeneberger

Jacob Schoeneberger

Jake Schoeneberger’s random entertainment opinions on the MCU

Before he even starts watching Spider-Man: No Way Home, Jacob Schoeneberger wants to outline his thoughts on this character and how he’s been treated in films over the past couple decades. When the Tobey Maguire (Sam Raimi) film first hit theaters, Jacob Schoeneberger felt it was undoubtedly the best comic book movie to be made since Tim Burton’s Batman. The Maguire/Raimi vision of Spider-Man felt genuine, it paid homage to his origin story from the comic books, and it had the right balance of humor and action. Suffice it to say, Jacob Schoeneberger was in heaven watching that movie.

The sequels in that iteration were good, the second movie being amazing and the third having its issues. Jacob Schoeneberger won’t delve into them here, we all know what they were, but overall they made a fun trilogy.

Then came Andrew Garfield’s version of Spider-Man. I won’t criticize it; all I can say is that it wasn’t my Spider-Man. It felt broody and darker, and I just didn’t connect with it. That’s not to say it was bad, it just wasn’t for me. And that’s ok.

Then came Tom Holland and the MCU version and once again Jake Schoeneberger was in heaven. Holland is the ideal Spider-Man in my opinion. He balances humor, vulnerability, and determination, just as I envision the character. Zendaya is great as MJ, bringing a level of toughness to the character that I find refreshing, and I like the way she challenges Peter but also captivates him. In addition, the antagonists have been awesome as well with Keaton and Gyllenhaal giving memorable performances.

All that having been said, it’s a huge understatement to say Jacob Schoeneberger has been dying to watch this new Spidey movie. So, I’m in for a treat! Random Jacob Schoeneberger Thoughts on Spider-Man: No Way Home

This will contain spoilers for anyone who hasn’t watched the movie yet.

I’m writing this as I watch the film so that I can provide a real-time journal of experiencing the movie. I really look forward to every new addition to the MCU, and this movie is no exception.

Love the opening scene of this film. From the WTF moment of Peter realizing his identity is lost, to swinging with MJ over the streets. The shots of them swinging together is a powerful view. It shows the intimacy and trust she has in him.

Things turn pretty rough after that with Peter, MJ, May, and Ned all being taken into custody (not to mention Happy and May breaking up, so long America’s Sweethearts power couple). It’s hard to hear how the agents can twist the facts to sound harsh. Vigilante justice, Ned being an accomplice to criminal activity, May facing charges of child endangerment. We know Spidey fights for bigger things, but it’s gut-wrenching to see how the realities of our world and justice system could churn them up this way.

OMG!!! I don’t mind admitting that Jake Schoeneberger nearly fell to the floor and passed out cold when Matt Murdock showed up as Peter’s attorney. I’m currently watching the Daredevil show and I am literally in love with it. Cox is amazing as Murdock, and I had no idea he’d be in this film. Happy does not begin to describe me right now. I’m ecstatic. And of course, he made sure the criminal charges didn’t stick, that’s what I’m talking about Attorney Murdock!

It’s funny how when Peter and MJ are talking about getting into college and affording it, Peter says he’s the most famous person in the world but he’s still broke. Cute concept but in reality, that’s not how it would be. If he was outed as Spidey, he’d have countless book deals, paid interviews and appearances, reality TV offers, movie offers, and more. He would be rich overnight if people found out he was Spidey. But it’s fun to play along in this world.

Ok, this is a bit of Jacob Schoeneberger playing the part of Captain Obvious here, but isn’t messing with the entire world’s memory a bad idea? I’m sure the whole reason this movie even exists is because Dr Strange is pulling some weird memory stuff, but shouldn’t he know better? During the What If show, Strange learned some hard lessons about messing with reality. I feel like he should be applying them here. Being a father figure for Peter now that Stark is gone = good idea. Messing with the consciousness of the entire planet = bad idea. C’mon Strange, get your head in the game!

Loved when Strange told Peter that the problem is that he’s trying to live two different lives. Murdock should have been there to hear him deliver that speech too!

So, Jacob Schoeneberger had a general idea of what they were doing with the plot of this movie from having read rumors leading up to the release. But I was seriously NOT prepared to see Molina return as Doc Ock. What an absolutely joyful moment when his iconic tentacles appeared. I’ll never forget first seeing Doc Ock all those years ago and being completely mesmerized. This moment matches that. And now Dafoe is back as Green Goblin! This movie really is going to be a fun ride.

We’ve got Lizard, Electro, Sandman… the gang’s all here! This movie is rapidly turning into a geek feast and the geek that is Jake Schoeneberger is loving it.

I love May’s take on this issue when Osborne comes to her shelter. She wants to try and help all these villains rather than just discarding them back to their own universes. She’s right, Spider-Man is supposed to be about helping people, not sweeping them under the rug.

Loving how trippy the Mirror Dimension looks. But Spidey is playing with dangerous concepts here. He wants to change the fate of the villains, but we learned in the Loki show we can’t change fates or timelines. Love how he’s teaming up with the villains, that’s a nice wrinkle, but I still wonder how this is going to play out for all involved. Timelines can’t be changed.

It’s funny. Now that the villains have predictably decided to keep their powers, this movie may ironically fall into the same trap that previous Spidey movies have fallen into: too many villains. They can run amok in this world, and the action might preserve this film as an enjoyable experience, but will it lose some of its character for it?

Was very, very unprepared for May’s death. I love how in this world she’s the one to give Peter the great power/great responsibility speech. That was incredibly touching. It’s followed closely by another incredibly touching scene on the rooftop with the three Spideys together. That scene is truly a thing of beauty as they compare their stories and the pain they all share. Not ashamed to say Jacob Schoeneberger shed a tear or two during that scene. We all share the pasts of these characters. They all came into our lives, and we shared their emotions. It’s really poignant to see them all together like this.

The three Spideys’ banter at the Statue of Liberty was just hilarious. I nearly died laughing when Maguire kept telling Garfield to say he’s “amazing.” Just brilliant writing and a nice dose of well-timed levity.

As I watch the thoroughly entertaining and edge-of-your-seat action of this final battle, I realize that the multiple villains thing works if you don’t have to do origin stories for each. This fight is awesome seeing them all break out their powers and just tear it up.

Ok, as the climax of this movie unfolds, I realize I am thoroughly unprepared emotionally to watch Peter say good-bye to his alternate selves and to MJ and Ned. It’s almost unthinkable for any one of us to imagine all the people we love forgetting about us, and to watch Peter prepare for this moment is heartbreaking. All the love lost, all the memories forgotten, all the emptiness of not existing to people anymore. That’s a loss none of us want to imagine, watching it happen to Peter hits your heart like a ton of bricks.

Really enjoyed the beautiful sendoffs for Maguire, Garfield, Dafoe, Foxx, Molina, Haden Church, and Ifans as they all faded into light and returned to their universes. It was like the MCU tipping its cap to the work they all did bringing life to its characters and acknowledging and respecting what they accomplished. It’s actually a comforting feeling knowing they now all exist within the bigger MCU multiverse, and we don’t have to pretend their adventures never happened.

I loved how Peter created a new Spidey suit for himself at the end. I’ll miss the fancy, high-tech Stark Industries one, but the old Jake Schoeneberger inside me loves that old-school, home-sewn feel.

This movie was incredible. It balanced emotion, action, and nostalgia perfectly while paving the way for the multiverse. I look forward to seeing how Peter will rebuild his emotional connection to his best friends, and how it almost feels like his character is starting over again. So many beautiful possibilities for the future.

P.S. That first mid-credits stinger was AWESOME! Love that Venom now has his evil little tendrils in the MCU.

P.P.S. That post-credits stinger was more a trailer for Multiverse of Madness than a scene. Meh. We can all watch trailers, I want a scene that teases something else. Color Jacob Schoeneberger disappointed with that one.

The Jake Schoeneberger Random Spider-Man Thought of the Day

As heartbreaking as it was to watch, we all need to get used to that scene where Peter talked to MJ at the donut shop, but she didn’t recognize him. He’ll have to earn her love again, and I think it’ll feel the same way when we see Quill and Gamora together again.

More Thoughts from Jacob Schoeneberger